When someone you love has lost someone who is near and dear to them, their pain may be overwhelming, and it can be difficult to know quite what to say to console them in their time of need. Just offering a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and a helping hand can work wonders. A well-considered condolence note can also soothe their pain and help them deal with the grief.
Consider these sample condolence notes for someone who has lost a loved one. These pre-written notes take the guesswork out of how to sensitively address the grief, yet they can also be used to inspire detailed letters of your own. Start with these samples, then add your own personal touches and feelings to the foundation that these samples provide.
Simple and Sincere
Someone who is grieving a major loss will probably not want to read a long, rambling note. The sympathy note isn't for your own catharsis. This is the time to address what your loved one needs. Try one of these simple and sincere notes. Add an introductory greeting and signature, and make changes to personalize your selected greeting as needed:
- I am so very loss for your loss. Although I didn't know (the deceased's name) as well as you did, I feel a sense of who he was from you stories. May the memories bring you comfort at this time. I'll be calling you tonight to check on you, but for now, I want to say how much I love you, and I am with you in spirit as you grieve.
- How very sorry for the loss of (the name of the deceased). You just shine when you share stories about him, so I do have a strong idea of how special he was through you, and I hope that you find solace in knowing that he will live on in your memories. I know he would be so proud of how you are handling this pain. I know that I am, and I am here for you. Sending you much love and hugs.
Notes to Accompany Gifts
If you are delivering a gift such as flowers or a donation to charity in memory of the deceased, be sure to send a meaningful note alongside the memorial gift. When the grieving loved one receives the note and gift at the funeral service, it is likely to be something that's remembered. Consider customizing one of these notes to accompany your memorial gift, being sure to change up the specifics to suit your exact needs.
- My thoughts are with you as you go through the process of grieving for (deceased person's name). I chose pink roses because I remember how you told me that they were meaningful for the friendship you shared with her. I don't know what you are feeling right now, but I do know that grief is one of the hardest burdens we must bear. It's said that it's the cost of having loved someone so fully. I wish I could take it away from you. Since I can't, I want you to know that I will be bringing over dinner tonight and that I'm here to help in any other way you need. I love you.
- I am thinking of you at this difficult time. I made a donation to (the deceased's charity of choice) in honor of (deceased person's name). I also did it to honor the love that I've seen you share. I am here for you every step of the way as you walk through this hard time. I have coordinated with other friends to make sure that you don't have to worry about dinner for the next two weeks to take some of the burden off your family, and I am here for you in every way you need me. Just call me any time. I love you.
Finally, keep in mind that you know your loved one, so trust your instincts when it comes to the right things to say. Always err on the side of caution. If you're not sure that humor will go over well, skip it. This is the time to play it safe and go out of your way to make your loved one as comfortable as possible as they cope with their grief.